toprincecharles
Trust female - 19 years, United Kingdom
Blog 53
-
i'm yours by jason mraz
Well you done done me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted
I fell right through the cracks and now I'm trying to get back
Before the cool done run out I'll be giving it my bestest
And nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention
I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some
But I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait, I'm yours
Well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
I look into your heart and you'll find love love love love
Listen to the music of the moment, people dance and sing
We're just one big family
And it's our God-forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved loved
So I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait, I'm sure
There's no need to complicate, our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours
D-d-do do you, do you, d-d-do, do you want to come?
Scooch on over closer dear, I'll whisper in your ear
Oh yes love, love love love love love
Love you love, love you love
I've been spending way too long tricking my tongue in the mirror
And bending over backwards just to try to see it clearer
But my breath fogged up the glass
And so I drew a new face and I laughed
I guess what I be saying is there ain't no better reason
To rid yourself of vanities and just go with the seasons
It's what we aim to do, our name is our virtue
But I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait, I'm yours
Come on and open up your mind and see like me
(I won't hesitate)
Open up your plans and damn you're free
(No more, no more)
I look into your heart and you'll find that the sky is yours
(It cannot wait, I'm sure)
So please don't, there's no need
(There's no need to complicate)
There's no need to complicate
(Our time is short)
'Cause our time is short
(This is our fate)
This is, this is, this is our fate
I'm yours, I'm sayin' I'm yours -
the place
THE PLACE
as the wind blows, you took me to a place
a horizon i've never known, never touched
a pure green field blooming with nothingness
pure, i call it
a place where there's no congestion
worries hang far into the galaxies
and you, whispering something
a secret that no one ever knows about
we held hands, standing at the edge of the earth
standing on the horizon line
i told you, impossible
but you've proven me wrong
and brought me to this place
where the twilight twinkles
the stars shone brilliantly
and you're whispering
whispering something yet again
i probed, asking for more of these words
these inaudible words
you had spoken without moving your lips
ah, the stars are saying something, you told me
i probed again, seemingly curious
for once, only once, you turned to me and said
"shhh... listen carefully..."
i did as was told
and melodious music i heard
cacophony of the green field singing
choir from the highest heavens
harp from behind the clouds
there was nothing else around
yet, something i heard from the wind
something that sounds like your secret
time would never suspend
i pleaded, but God allowed not
for a time like such to happen for eternity
this is divine, i thought
for i'll never have a moment like this with you again
for every second that past
the landscape changes
changes drastically
from the beautiful twilight into the menacing morning
alas, our time is due
you turned to me and smiled
when i returned the gesture with a tear
surely, you have to go
everything would disappear in that instant
you pulled my hand and ran non-stop
i was reluctantly dragged behind
stop, please stop running
let the sun never come
for i know when it does, as promised
you would vanish
baby, leave me not
i'll stick to you
till death do us part
in a distance i saw a figure
a figure so great
i could not comprehend its magnitude nor potency
loss took me over
awestruck, perhaps fear
enveloped the entire of me
as the sun inches up from where we were standing
i sink, deeper every second into a bottomless abyss
is this called hell, i wonder
pain engulf me every moment passes
i cringed, struggled for freedom
yet futile as it was, i was held captive
captivated by the pain of separation
suddenly everything went black
i could no longer feel
you inching away, dissipating
seemingly surreal separation
was prematurely terminated
i could no longer see
see the pureness of jade green under my feet
i felt myself collapsing uncontrollably
falling into a relief of painlessness
a world of anesthesia
a blank page of an error print novel
consciousness soon arrived
and yes, i'd been asleep for a millennium
yes, there you laid beside me
a face so aged i never knew
you stared at me, surprised
whispering again
this is audible
you'd waited for a millennium
until i'd regain consciousness
you picked me up
held my hand
hobbled for hours as you brought me to that place again
the place where the twilight reigned and stars cheered
the place where you owe me a secret you never told
finally we'd arrived
everything suspended for us
the same as it was
you took out a dazzling brilliant stone
banded with a ring
you slipped it through my last finger
and collapsed...
you never regained your consciousness
never, i waited till i died
but now i've known the secret you've kept from me
a secret you engraved deep into the ring
i stood and stared
yes, these were crystal clear
you wanted to tell me
"I LOVE YOU" -
1st msg
i've decided to change my nickname to "to prince charles". because i miss you, and i love you still.
i've just spoken to zoe. things aren't the way we thought to be.
sigh. i haven't seen you for ages, because this time you were outfield at sembawang, then pulau tekong bmtc. and i've heard so much, expected so much, yet this day will be where i put a period on the chapter.
zoe will ask you, "which is more important, your law education, or this relationship?"
it's 99.8% the former i guess. if it were me, i'd have chosen my education over the latter.
will we wait? i doubt myself. first thing on the list is someone spiritual. you know it. someone who loves God more than i do, loves God more than anything else(including me) and has a similar calling as mine.
are you far from it? at this point in time, the only thing i'm conscious of is probably the pain of cleaving the relationship, reversing the scale from 7(tending towards 10, a relationship) to 5 (good friends).
will i be harsh? yes. because i love God more. i don't know if i love you, because i hadn't been doing anything. i'm fond of you, but uncertain if i'm ready to love you.
you know...
phoebe (6 letters)
prince (6 letters)
charles (7 letters)
zhinian (7 letters)
kuan seng (8 letters)
princess (8 letters)
i'd been a little depressed over this entire matter. it would mean me not going out with you one on one, no talking too long on the phone, no buying presents or making cards till everything's over, and the scale's reversed.
now then. is there any point doing that? but yet, how not to? you're still, what i call, untainted.
will i continue to read my newspaper? probably. i'll miss you every time i do that. similarly when i'm walking home, on that route you sent me back, in the park, when we sat on the swing, on the way to jurong point, when we'd walked together, in labrador park, in raffles city, in practically, everywhere.
you seem to have infused into my life almost completely...
will i still be your princess? will i, charles? will i? will you like someone else? will i wait for you? will i get another guy? will i still love you when you're away? will i be left on the shelf and you happily married when you get back? will i speak my singlish and you with your A1 perfect english? will you still love me? will you wait for me? will you forget me? will you tell me you love me in person, and bring me all over the world to egypt and new york and the himalayans and the french alps and the great rift valley, the grand canyon, the niagara falls, and to paris, us holding hands walking on cobblestone, looking at the great museums, the pretty fashion and the majestic eiffel tower and you propose to me? and we spend our honeymoon there? that's our story, our nowhere. somewhere that belongs to you, and me.
i was really ='( today after meeting zoe at centrepoint, i know she's right, but somehow it's hard to accept everything. and i gotta do something i hate doing, AGAIN, ignoring the person my heart calls out to. it was drizzling when i stepped out of that place, and i walked in the rain. on the train, this freakin big guy intentionally bumped into me twice! and uh, of course, if you want to be intentional, you hit the right place. gosh. for the first time i wanted to scream "ahh... molester!! " in the train. twice leh. wah liew~
bolong sms me, ahh.. feeling like crap lor. makes me wonder if i'll end up with him instead of you. lol. not even if all the man goes extinct, i guess.
i alighted the train, it was raining like mad. i went to cheers and got myself some comfort food, and decided on chocolates - cadbury picnic. it really worked wonders, i felt so much better after eating that. but then afterwards, i'd decided. i'll never touch chocolates for as much as i can. know why?
NO AMOUNT OF CHOCOLATES CAN SUBSTITUTE YOU.
NO AMOUNT OF CHOCOLATES IS HALF AS SWEET AS LOVE.
I DON'T HAVE A LOVE AFFAIR WITH CHOCOLATES. IT'S NOT GOING TO MAKE ME HAPPY, JUST FAT.
i think i'm still going to run regardless of what happen. i'll think of you when i run. i'm going to channel all the energy to studies. and yes, i love zoe, despite all these. lol.
no twisties too. actually, i'd like to ban twisties on you. lol. if you don't eat twisties anymore, i'm not going to touch chocolates anymore. but think about it, actually, who cares? just share lor. haha.
would love to have a telescope, move to hawaii and watch neptune with my cha2 er3 si1 wang2 zi3.
phoebe = shining radiance. that's me, ain't it? nah. i stick to zhinian, something you call and call so sweetly. haha.
i feel so much better confiding in you, really. go bah, your uni's waiting for you. and get a girl if you find a suitable one. let's just be friends and see what really happens, if this love story will unfold into a happily ever after ending in diamonds and platinum, in eiffel tower and cobblestone pavement, in hawaii and watching stars, we completing one another.
i feel so selfish, trying to make a good guy stay. lol. charleston, rong hwee, weiwen, phatchara. mitchell, marcus, zhen yu...
now it's you, mr charles tay. prince charles. sir charles.
think over it. i am not that guai a girl. out of all, i've been nicest to you. cuz i know i'll hurt, i stay away. but i eventually still hurt you. i'm sorry.
anything i'm going to say to you, i'll write it here.
i won't promise i'll wait for you. but i'll definitely think of you every now and then.
get the girl you love, i'll accept it, no matter how painful. i'll smile, and give all my blessings.
cheers to charles' girlfriend-to-be in the future!
from your _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
ZHINIAN -
it's me again./.
haix...it's been a long time...
charles and i are friends...
mr potassium hydroxide... lol...
busy busy busy... -
been a long time
it's been a long time since i'd blogged. so many things have happened, especially between me and charles. probably all these things are good in its way. durian and all! hmm shall talk a little about it.
second meeting we went to swissotel's equinox for scenery gazing. third he walked me home all the way from jp! twas such a long way, but we had lots of fun. met up with jun yao, then he sent me home. probably that's the first time he sent me to my doorstep, at least that's the first i could remember. it was a long long tour around jurong! hehe. lots of chinese and stuff we talked about. realised he's not the verbal people. he'd rather "for me to know, for you to find out". hehe. quite strange. perhaps he doesn't know that people needs affirmation. anyway, i'm glad he's not saying anything. i'll melt if he does. we went to play swing before we left. erm. i think one bad thing about me is that i make his moves very motive-driven. everything that he does, i'll tag a purpose for it, which makes him feel so.. uh... not that good. say he wants to spend more time with me and therefore send me home, i'll explicitly say it till he understands. wooh... that's not something really nice about me.
recently he invited me to his camp's dinner and dance. bring a female partner, and he invited me. by default i wonder how many has he invited, by trust i know i'm the one and only. that makes the entire thing very... uh... privileged. haha. forget it, it's $150 for two.
fourth we went NDP preview together. hmm... that's really nice i must add. he's beena gor gor throughout the entire event, till after the parade, where he had quirky ideas to WALK TO ORCHARD from marina. lol. we went to exactly the same place where we had been to the previous time. marina square. went marketplace and he got me an old jamaica. haha. before that we went godiva to look at chocolates. was exorbitantly expensive! anyway. we shared the chocolate at St Andrew's Cathedral. he ate some bread there too, under the stars, the gaze of the equinox tower and beside the koi pond. haha... it was rather cool. save it in your memory.
loves. that sort of feeling. but but but... i can't go into relationship and be dependent. if he decides to withdraw from the contract, i'll still be fine, that's my erm... only consolation?
i just woke up.its early morning. and i dreamt we kissed. aww man... i remember kissing him, then him kissing me, in some beautiful secluded areas. erm.. can't recall though.
he *uh hmm* me on the lips. couldn't resist it. woah. this shows lots. probably i'm waiting. probably when the time comes again i'll not be able to resist it.
BUT I WILL STILL RESIST IT. physical intimacy = bgr = not for me. -
CDC pre-step down
believe it or not, i'm not at all excited except about the party. wishing i could still be there, to chat, to manage, to call the shots...
nah, it ain't anything about calling the shots. i just like to be around...
alright... shall blog again... -
after such a long time...
a knight in shining armor
a knight with commendable chivalry
a knight with the name of a prince, behaves like one, deserving to be called one
yes, we're friends, but sometimes, you make me feel so loved, really. could it be that you're just nice to everyone? i suppose. i think at the rate i'm going, it seems like i'll end up like a korean or jap drama, like a girl liking a guy unconsciously.
THE PLACE
as the wind blows, you took me to a place
a horizon i've never known, never touched
a pure green field blooming with nothingness
pure, i call it
a place where there's no congestion
worries hang far into the galaxies
and you, whispering something
a secret that no one ever knows about
we held hands, standing at the edge of the earth
standing on the horizon line
i told you, impossible
but you've proven me wrong
and brought me to this place
where the twilight twinkles
the stars shone brilliantly
and you're whispering
whispering something yet again
i probed, asking for more of these words
these inaudible words
you had spoken without moving your lips
ah, the stars are saying something, you told me
i probed again, seemingly curious
for once, only once, you turned to me and said
"shhh... listen carefully..."
i did as was told
and melodious music i heard
cacophony of the green field singing
choir from the highest heavens
harp from behind the clouds
there was nothing else around
yet, something i heard from the wind
something that sounds like your secret
time would never suspend
i pleaded, but God allowed not
for a time like such to happen for eternity
this is divine, i thought
for i'll never have a moment like this with you again
for every second that past
the landscape changes
changes drastically
from the beautiful twilight into the menacing morning
alas, our time is due
you turned to me and smiled
when i returned the gesture with a tear
surely, you have to go
everything would disappear in that instant
you pulled my hand and ran non-stop
i was reluctantly dragged behind
stop, please stop running
let the sun never come
for i know when it does, as promised
you would vanish
baby, leave me not
i'll stick to you
till death do us part
in a distance i saw a figure
a figure so great
i could not comprehend its magnitude nor potency
loss took me over
awestruck, perhaps fear
enveloped the entire of me
as the sun inches up from where we were standing
i sink, deeper every second into a bottomless abyss
is this called hell, i wonder
pain engulf me every moment passes
i cringed, struggled for freedom
yet futile as it was, i was held captive
captivated by the pain of separation
suddenly everything went black
i could no longer feel
you inching away, dissipating
seemingly surreal separation
was prematurely terminated
i could no longer see
see the pureness of jade green under my feet
i felt myself collapsing uncontrollably
falling into a relief of painlessness
a world of anesthesia
a blank page of an error print novel
consciousness soon arrived
and yes, i'd been asleep for a millennium
yes, there you laid beside me
a face so aged i never knew
you stared at me, surprised
whispering again
this is audible
you'd waited for a millennium
until i'd regain consciousness
you picked me up
held my hand
hobbled for hours as you brought me to that place again
the place where the twilight reigned and stars cheered
the place where you owe me a secret you never told
finally we'd arrived
everything suspended for us
the same as it was
you took out a dazzling brilliant stone
banded with a ring
you slipped it through my last finger
and collapsed...
you never regained your consciousness
never, i waited till i died
but now i've known the secret you've kept from me
a secret you engraved deep into the ring
i stood and stared
yes, these were crystal clear
you wanted to tell me
"I LOVE YOU" -
it's the end of me
faith is a powerful substance.
prayer is the most powerful weapon.
and me? the most blessed woman on earth.
blessed. that's me.
perfect. that's me.
and hope. that's still me.
agapeo... -
we're just friends
dear dear charles
we're just friends. lol. it's an irony. it's probably a paradox.
you're dead blurr. i dunno why.
can't believe you treat me like your girlfriend and telling me we're just friends. oh well. that's cool al the same.
zijie is looking at this blog, looking at his sister type the message. how about that?
how did i do that, he wonders,,, how could i face him and type at the same time...
love love zijie. he's me most beloveed brother.... cute cute...
hehe...
he was the one who had asked me to put the hug emocon
anyway... charles,.. i'm glad everything is over. but please, let it stay this way alright?
it's a perfect bordeux. perfect love. <sempurna>.
let's toast to the forever friendship!
love ya. always. -
to zhinian.
collapse, the 4-dimensional.
God is good, no matter how bad a girl i may be.