virginia davis's blog

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markosgoddess — Sun, 11 May 2008 16:03:56 UT

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Irish Blessings

markosgoddess — Mon, 17 Mar 2008 15:14:48 UT

May you live as long as you want,
And never want as long as you live.
May the roof above us never fall in.
And may the friends below it never fall out.
May you have warm words on a cold evening,
A full moon on a dark night,
And the road downhill all the way to your door.
May there be a generation of children
On the children of your children.
May you live to be a hundred years,
With one extra year to repent!
May the Lord keep you in His hand
And never close His fist too tight.
May your neighbors respect you,
Trouble neglect you,
The angels protect you,
And heaven accept you.
May your pockets be heavy and your heart be light,
May good luck pursue you each morning and night.
May the saddest day of your future be no worse
Than the happiest day of your past.
May you always have work for your hands to do.
May your pockets hold always a coin or two.
May the sun shine bright on your windowpane.
May the rainbow be certain to follow each rain.

I send you Irish Kisses

TEXAS HUMOR

markosgoddess — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 15:55:50 UT

Three men - a Canadian farmer, Osama bin Laden and a Texan are all working together one day.

They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.

'I will give each one of you one wish, which is three wishes in total', says the Genie.

The Canadian says, 'I am a farmer and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada .'

POOF! With the blink of the Genie's eye, the land in Canada was forever fertile for farming.

Osama was amazed, so he said, 'I want a wall around Afghanistan , Palestine , Iraq and Iran so that no infidels, Americans or Canadians can come in our precious land.'

POOF! Again, with the blink of the Genie's eye, there was a huge wall around those countries.

The Texan says, 'I am very curious. Please tell me more about this wall.'

The Genie explains, 'Well, it's about 5,000 feet high, 5oo feet thick and completely surrounds the countries. Nothing can get in or out; it's virtually impenetrable.'

The Texan sits down, cracks a beer, smiles, and says, 'Fill it with water.

How soon do you need to know

markosgoddess — Sat, 01 Mar 2008 06:24:36 UT

Name

Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades.

Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities

and adventures.

Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few

times a week to play cards. One day, they were playing

cards, when one looked at the other and said, 'Now don't

get mad at me. I know we've been friends for a long time,

but I just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought,

but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is.'

Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just

stared and glared at her. Finally she said, 'How soon do

you need to know?

The rooster,farmer and politician

markosgoddess — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 16:38:15 UT

Take heed...

John the farmer was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens), called 'pullets', and ten roosters, whose job it was to fertilize the eggs.

The farmer kept records and any rooster that didn't perform went into the soup pot and was replaced. That took an awful lot of his time, so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so John could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.

The farmer's favorite rooster was old Butch, a very fine specimen he was, too. But on this particular morning John noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all! John went to investigate.

The other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.

But to Farmer John's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the Renfrew County Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result...The judges not only awarded old Butch the No Bell Piece Prize but they also awarded him the Pulletsurprise as well.

Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making: who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.

Remember to Vote carefully...the bells are not always audible.

Redneck Valentine

markosgoddess — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 22:14:18 UT

Redneck Valentine

Collards is green,

my dog's name is Blue

And I'm so lucky to have

a sweet thang like you.

Yore hair is like corn silk

a-flapping in the breeze.

Softer than Blue's

and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass,

which excite me in May.

You ain't got no scales

but I luv you anyway.

Yo're as satisfy'n as okry

jist a-fry'n in the pan.

Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"

right out of the can.

You have some'a yore teeth,

for which I am proud;

I hold my head high

when we're out in a crowd.

On special occasions,

when you shave under yore arms,

Well, I'm in hawg heaven,

and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work,

they all want to know,

What I did to deserve

such a purdy, young doe.

Like a good roll of duct tape,

yo're there fer yore man,

To patch up life's troubles

and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug

a-buzzin' overhead.

You ain't mean like those far ants

I found in my bed.

Cut from the best cloth

like a plaid flannel shirt,

You spark up my life

more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight

like a padded gunrack,

My life is complete;

Ain't nuttin' I lack.

Yore complexion, it's perfection,

like the best vinyl sidin'.

Despite all the years,

yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie

with a RC cold drank,

We go together

like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men,

they buy chocolate for Valentine's Day;

They git it at Wal-Mart,

it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses

on that special day

From the cooler at Kroger.

That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds

from a flea market booth.

"Diamonds are forever,"

they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey,

these won't do.

Cause yor'e too special,

you sweet thang you.

I got you a gift,

without taste nor odor,

More useful than diamonds...

IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!

First Camping Trip

markosgoddess — Thu, 14 Feb 2008 04:30:37 UT

First Camping Trip

Some Boy Scouts from the big city were on a camping trip

for the first time.

The mosquitoes were so fierce, the boys had to hide

under their blankets to avoid being bitten.

Then one of them saw some lightening bugs and said to his

friend, "We might as well give up. Now they're coming after

us with flashlights!"

are u kathlick?

markosgoddess — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 07:19:16 UT

Three little Boys were concerned

because they couldn't get anyone to play with them.

They decided it was because they had not been Baptized

and didn't go to Sunday School.

So they went to the nearest Church...

But, only the Janitor was there.

One little Boy said,

"We need to be baptized

Because no one will come out and play with Us.

Will You baptize Us?"

"Sure," said the Janitor.

He took them into the bathroom

And dunked their little heads in the toilet bowl,

One at a time.
Then he said, "You are now Baptized!".

" When they got outside,

one of them asked,

"What religion do You think We are?"
The oldest one said,

"We're not Kathlick, .because they pour the water on You."

"We're not Babtis, .because they dunk all of You in the water."

"We're not Methdiss, .because they just sprinkle water on You."

The littlest one said, "Didn't you smell that water?"

They all asked,
"Yeah! What do You think that means?"

"I think it means we're Pisscopailians!!!

blonde cowboy

markosgoddess — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 07:15:41 UT

The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and sees a blonde
cowboy coming down the walk with nothing on but his cowboy hat,
gun, and his boots; so he arrests him for indecent exposure.

As he is locking him up, he asks "Why in the world are you dressed
like this?

The Cowboy says, "Well it's like this Sheriff. I was in the bar down the road
and this pretty little redhead asks me to go out to her motor home with her.
So I did.

We go inside and she pulls off her top and asks me to pull off my
shirt, so I did.

Then she pulls off her skirt and asks me to pull off my pants...so I did.

Then she pulls off her panties and asks me to pull off my shorts ... so I did.

Then she gets on the bed and looks at me kind of sexy and says, "Now go
to town, cowboy!"

And here I am.

Son of a Gun, Blonde Men do exist.

The Warrior of the Light

markosgoddess — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 16:12:19 UT

The Warrior of the Light views life with tenderness and determination.

He stands before a Mystery, whose solution he will one day find.

Every so often, he says to himself: "This life is absolutely insane."

He is right.

In surrendering to the miracle of the everyday, he notices that he cannot always foresee the consequences of his actions.

Sometimes he acts without knowing that he is doing so, he saves someone without even knowing he is saving them, he suffers without even knowing why he is sad.

Yes, life is insane.

But the great Wisdom of the Warrior lies in choosing his insanity wisely.

The Warrior of the Light studies the two columns on either side of the door he is trying to open.

One is called Fear and the other is called Desire.

The Warrior looks at the column of Fear and on it is written:

"You are entering a dangerous, unfamiliar world where everything you have learned up until now will prove useless."

The Warrior looks at the column of Desire and on it is written:

"You are about to leave a familiar world wherein are stored all the things you ever wanted and for which you struggled long and hard."

The Warrior smiles because nothing frightens him and nothing holds him.

With the confidence of one who knows what he wants, he opens the door.

When somebody wants something, the whole Universe conspires in their favor.

The Warrior of the Light knows this.

For this reason, he takes great care with his thoughts.

Hidden beneath a whole series of good intentions lie feelings that no one dares confess to himself:

Vengeance, self-destruction, guilt, fear of winning, a macabre of joy at other people's tragedies.

The Universe does not judge; it conspires in favor of what we want.

That is why the Warrior has the courage to look into the dark places of his Soul in order to ensure that he is not asking for the wrong things.

And he is always very careful about what he thinks.

The Warrior knows that he is free to choose his desires, and he makes these decisions with courage, detachment, and --sometimes--with just a touch of madness.

"understand"

markosgoddess — Wed, 30 Jan 2008 16:08:05 UT

journeys into twilights shade
I place the stones at the entrance made
many pass this well worn path
the circle opens into one so vast
speaking words who have no sound
the tone of heart is all around
sleep is one way to move this view
as I cast the stone through this reflection true
spear and arrow holding straight
the moving shafts the time is late
purpose smoke cedar and sage
the path is walked from another age
tattoo of birds a leather bag
in these dreams of colour I will tie your flag
purple glow as you look to clear
the wings are opened the flight is near
braided hair this love of mine
painted upon horses in your eyes to shine
dressed in mornings sacred dew
feet feeling her love and passed through
songs of horses songs of wind
the dream recurring where searching begins
sandstone blessings kissing my cheek
the markings are left by you to seek
tied in waters slumber song
I stand in place where light stretches long
take this emptiness I give to you
it is the cup of life beyond her veil you knew
water mind shimmers before
the gathering dreams traditions folklore
no-words may I take away
as light records everything at play
words in mountains words in form
stars are falling in this view we are born
jumping heart rivers have washed
swimming in solace the dance is not lost
arms extended head to the side
to bless this land and wind horses to ride
lines of yellow lines of red
the softness of mother as I lay my head
visions of smoke cover me
quarters are balanced walking free
peirced through this painted breast
marked for life she speaks of the eternal rest
views are made tied in string
I give you all that I own and sing
placed before a dream you possess
if you still your life you will feel its caress
marking memories in your hands
you have blessed yourself do you understand

A SUNSET

markosgoddess — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 05:33:43 UT

Sunset becomes the start of each day,
youth grows with age as all time slips away.
Nature & beauty dance with the flow,
light blends with colors ...an elegant show.
Waves from the water of perfect design,
visions & images appear in the mind.
Thoughts become real if you’re looking inside,
meaning & destiny as its time has arrived.
Dismiss all the feelings that are holding you back...
capture the moment, that is the knack.
Create for yourself what is most in your thoughts,
appreciate & cherish and look toward its source.
Going to detail but beginning from scratch,
embracing the moment, making the catch.
Dreams of the future show what loving can bring,
and it comes from the energy in all living things

COME BACK AND BE MY EVERYTHING

markosgoddess — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 04:47:45 UT

COME BACK AND BE MY EVERYTHING
I need your arms around me
Im afraid Im losing you
You wont let go of worries
And I dont know what to do.
All I know is when Im laying In my bed alone at night
Is that I want to save our love
And I cant give up this fight.
Maybe we were wrong With some choices we have made
But I never thought we'd lose it all
And now Im so afraid.
Wont you reach your hand out to me
Pick me up from off my knees
Take the hurting from inside me
And end my heartfelt pleas
There are times I feel so lonely
My heart thrown into despair
But I pray if I keep trying,
This love can be repaired.
Everytime I think about you
My hands begin to shake,
For my entire world is balanced
On the decision that you make.
Im losing all my hope
As time is passing by
I cant call you, I cant see you
So all I do is cry.
This is tearing me to pieces
I cant even clear my head
You are all that I can think of
I just pray your loves not dead.
Please take this space between us
And bring it to an end,
Come back and be my everything,
My lover, my best friend

Fairy Tales and Pegasus

markosgoddess — Mon, 21 Jan 2008 04:42:41 UT

Fairy Tales and Pegasus........
Feel me with your fingertips, hold me in your arms
Feel my breath upon your face, longing for your charms
Quiet anticipation, a heart that's full of love
Looking in your eyes and knowing there's a God
The earth is filled with wonder, I long to see it all
Feelings in my heart, trying not to fall
Tell me that you want me, take me by the hand
I'll lead you to a paradise that will make you glad again
Gentle kisses lingering softly on my lips
Looking in your eyes and knowing I've been kissed
The feel of you against my breast as I fall asleep each night
Waking in your arms and knowing everythings right
I believe in miracles, I believe in you
Telling me you love me and believing in me too
Fairy tales and Pegasus, stranger things come true
Longing to be in your arms making love to you

Queensryche - Silent Lucidity

markosgoddess — Sun, 13 Jan 2008 05:13:40 UT

I love this song

Artist: Queensryche
Title: Silent Lucidity

Hush now, don't you cry
Wipe away the teardrop from your eye
You're lying safe in bed
It was all a bad dream
Spinning in your head
Your mind tricked you to feel the pain
Of someone close to you leaving the game of life
So here it is, another chance
Wide awake you face the day
Your dream is over... or has it just begun?

There's a place i like to hide
A doorway that i run through in the night
Relax child, you were there
But only didn't realize it and you were scared
It's a place where you will learn
To face your fears, retrace the years
And ride the whims of your mind
Commanding in another world
Suddenly you hear and see
This magic new dimension

I- will be watching over you
I- am gonna help you see it through
I- will protect you in the night
I- am smiling next to you, in silent lucidity

If you open your mind for me
You won't rely on open eyes to see
The walls you built within
Come tumbling down, and a new world will begin
Living twice at once you learn
You're safe from the pain in the dream domain
A soul set free to fly
A round trip journey in your head
Master of illusion, can you realize
Your dream's alive, you can be the guide but...

I- will be watching over you
I- am gonna help to see it through
I- will protect you in the night
I- am smiling next to you....

sip the vodka

markosgoddess — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 18:26:37 UT

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly
speak.
After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.
The monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting
nervous on the pulpit,I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass.If I start to get

nervous, I take a sip."

So next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice.
At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink.
He proceeded to talk up a storm.
Upon his return to his office after the mass,he found the following note on the door:

1) Sip the vodka, don't gulp.

2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.

3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.

4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.

5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.

6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.

7)The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to
as Big Daddy,Junior and the spook.

8)David slew Goliath; he did not kick the shit out of him.

9)When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off
his donkey, don't say
he was stoned off his ass.

10)We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T."

11)When Jesus broke the bread at the last supper he
he said,
Take this and eat it for it is my body."
He did not say "Eat me".

12)The Virgin Mary is not called "Mary with the Cherry".

13)The recommended grace before a meal is not:
Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, Yeah God.

14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest
at St.Peter's
not a peter pulling contest at St.Taffy's.

remember

markosgoddess — Thu, 10 Jan 2008 16:20:54 UT

Make sure u have ur volume on
this always brings a tear to my eye everytime I view this link
I miss and love u mom and dad u r my heros

http://parentswish.com/site01/big.html

Can I borrow $25.00

markosgoddess — Sun, 06 Jan 2008 01:12:55 UT

A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year
old son waiting for him at the door.

SON: 'Daddy, may I ask you a question?'
DAD: 'Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the man.
SON: 'Daddy, how much do you make an hour?'
DAD: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the
man said angrily.
SON: 'I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an
hour?'
DAD: 'If you must know, I make $50 an hour.'
SON: 'Oh,' the little boy replied, with his head down.
SON: 'Daddy, may I please borrow $25?'

The father was furious, 'If the only reason you asked that is so you
can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then
you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why
you are being so selfish. I don't work hard everyday for such childish
frivolities.' The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.

The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy's
questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money? After
about an hour or so, the man had calmed down , and started to think:
Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25.00 and
he really didn't ask for money very often. The man went to the door of
the little boy's room and opened the door. 'Are you asleep, son?' He
asked. 'No daddy, I'm awake,' replied the boy. 'I've been thinking,
maybe I was too hard o n you earlier' said the man. 'It's been a long
day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here's the $25 you
asked for.'

The lit t le boy sat straight up, smiling. 'Oh, thank you daddy!'
He yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled
up bills. The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get
angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then
looked up at his father. 'Why do you want more money if you already
have some?' the father grumbled. Because I didn't have enough, but now
I do,' the little boy replied. 'Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an
hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to
have dinner with you.'

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he
begged for his forgiveness. It's just a short reminder to all of you
working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our
fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to
us, those close to our hearts. Do remember to share that $50 worth of
your time with someone you love.

If we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily
replace us in a matter of hours. But the family &friends we leave
behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives.

How to Clean the House

markosgoddess — Sun, 30 Dec 2007 23:18:36 UT

1. Open a new file in your PC.

2. Name it "Housework."

3. Send it to the RECYCLE BIN.

4. Empty the RECYCLE BIN.

5. Your PC will ask you, "Are you sure you want to

delete Housework permanently?"

6. Calmly answer, "Yes," and press the mouse button

firmly.

Feel better?

Old Dog, New Trick!

markosgoddess — Fri, 28 Dec 2007 16:29:16 UT

An old, tired-looking dog wandered into the yard.

I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that

he had a home.

He followed me into the house, down the hall, and

fell asleep in a corner. An hour later, he went to the

door, and I let him out.

The next day he was back, resumed his position in

the hall, and slept for an hour. This continued for

several days.

Curious, I pinned a note to his collar: "Every

afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap."

The next day he arrived with a different note

pinned to his collar:

"He lives in a home with ten children --

He's trying to catch up on his sleep.

Can I come with him tomorrow?"

funny

markosgoddess — Sun, 23 Dec 2007 18:09:49 UT

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

Cover me. I'm changing lanes.

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools.

Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.

Sometimes I wake up grumpy, Other times I let him sleep.

I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming and
yelling like the passengers in his car.

I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a
vegetarian.

It is as bad as you think, and they are out to get you.

I took an IQ test and the results were negative.

Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?

If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?

It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.

Forget about World Peace... Visualise Using Your Turn Signal!

Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.

Give me ambiguity or give me something else.

We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse.

Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.

He who laughs last thinks slowest

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.

Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.

i souport publik edekasion

We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile.You Will Be Assimilated.

Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.

Three kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.

Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'...till you can find a
rock.

Life as a Turkey

markosgoddess — Fri, 21 Dec 2007 15:48:34 UT

Life as a Turkey

When I was a young turkey, new to the coop,

My big brother Mike took me out on the stoop;

Then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow,

And he told me there was something that I had to know.

His look and his tone I will always remember,

When he told me of the horrors of ... Black November;

"Come about August, now listen to me,

Each day you'll get six meals instead of just three."

"And soon you'll be thick, where once you were thin,

And you'll grow a big rubbery thing under your chin;

And then one morning, when you're warm in your bed,

In will burst the farmer's wife, and hack off your head."

"Then she'll pluck out your feathers so you're bald 'n pink,

And scoop out all your insides and leave ya lyin' in the sink;

And then comes the worst part," he said not bluffing,

She'll spread your cheeks and pack your rear with stuffing!"

Well, the rest of his words were too grim to repeat,

I sat on the stoop like a winged piece of meat;

I decided on the spot that to avoid being cooked,

I'd have to lay low and remain overlooked.

I began a new diet of nuts and granola,

High-roughage salads, juice and diet cola;

And as they ate pastries, chocolates and crepes,

I stayed in my room doing exercise tapes.

I maintained my weight of two pounds and a half,

And tried not to notice when the bigger birds laughed;

But 'twas I who was laughing, under my breath,

As they chomped and they chewed, ever closer to death.

And sure enough when Black November rolled around,

I was the last turkey left in the entire compound!

So now I'm a pet in the farmer's wife's lap,

I haven't a worry, so I eat and I nap.

She held me today, while sewing and humming,

And smiled at me and said

"Christmas is coming ...

happy

markosgoddess — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 02:09:32 UT

Life is too short for drama & petty things!
So laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly!
From one unstable person to another...Hope everyone is happy in your head - we're all doin' pretty good in mine!

merry christmas

markosgoddess — Wed, 19 Dec 2007 01:54:05 UT

It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco . The pastor
of the church was looking over the crèche when he noticed that the baby
Jesus was missing from among the figures. He hurried outside and saw a
little boy with a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the
little infant Jesus.

So he walked up to the boy and said, "Well, where did you get your
passenger, my fine friend?"

The little boy replied, "I got Him at church."

And why did you take Him?"

The boy explained, "Well, about a week before Christmas I prayed to the
little Lord Jesus and I told Him if He would bring me a red wagon for
Christmas I would give Him a ride around the block in it."

MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE!