kev m's blog

New Thia wife

dumpdee — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 19:45:26 UT

Man is lying beside his new Thia bride

His wife keeps stroking his c**k

He sez do love it that much

She replies

No i just miss mine
lolzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

friends and family in the pub

dumpdee — Sun, 28 Oct 2007 20:24:49 UT

A man walks into a bar
and shouts across the bar
to three young lads
\" I sh*****d your mum last nite

The lads ignore him
He shouts again
\"Up the a** as well \"

They still ignore him
He shouts again a third time
\"She sucked my knob to\"

One of the lads stands up
and shouts

\"Fck off home dad your drunk \"

my grandadson collects old football ticket stubs

dumpdee — Mon, 24 Sep 2007 22:12:25 UT

Hi peeps my grandson collect old football ticket stubs .I have made a few shouts for some he has been collectiong since he recieved his uncles ticket collection,
IF ANYONE HAS ANY LYING AROUND THE HOUSE THEY NO LONGER WANT I WOULD BE VERY GRATEFUL ( LOVE TO SEE HIS FACE WHEN I GIVE HIM SOME )
Have fun and be happy to you all
regards Kev

whats your opinion ? i find this crazy.YES or NO

dumpdee — Sun, 16 Sep 2007 08:40:44 UT

I work with guys from Poland Latvia and from other eastern europe states, 1st i would to state i have visited these place and no theres not much there for them.
I was in the pub friday with one of them hes here alone i was amazed to find out his wife can clain family allowance & family credits back home from the brittish goverment
crazy in my opinion no wonder this place is getting flooded out with them
U/K SOFT TOUCH YES OR NO ?
i know there will be diffrent opinions on this but have your say

Its a hard life ( Funny lol )

dumpdee — Sun, 16 Sep 2007 07:57:29 UT

Its a hard life being a penis

You have a head with no brain

one eye thats blind

Two neghbours that are nuts

And the others an arsehole

And your best mates a cunt

Musical Octopus

dumpdee — Tue, 11 Sep 2007 20:45:09 UT

Octopus walks into a bar and says "i bet i can play any musical instrument"
guy gives him a guitar and he plays it like Jim Hendrix
second bloke says "wow" but i bet you cant play the piano and he plays the piano like Elton John
Scotsman hands him the bagpipes the octopus fumbles for a minute and looks confused
jock says "see you canna play it "
Octupus replies"play it am gonna shag it when i get its fucking pyjamas off"

Latvia , Estonia , Finland some tips

dumpdee — Wed, 25 Jul 2007 21:28:19 UT

Just returned from Latvia Estonia and Finland August weather was great bit surprised myself for the time of year also with the weather we have been getting here
Riga is a great city to visit,if you have not booked a hotel before you go best to haggle over hotel price i got a room will internet sauna ect for 65 lats the girl was asking for 165 at the start so there can be bargains obtained also your best to eat out very cheap,plenty to see here, would advise to stay clear of the bus station area at night
There are no trains between Riga and Tallinn the bus takes around 5 hrs
Tallinn in Estonia is pretty good,best to visit the old city food and drink are cheap to,would advise to stay near the city centre area
You can get a ferry or fast boat to Helsinki 3 hrs or 1 and a half on the fast boat cost around £15 but well worth it
Helsinki bit more exp but you can buy a 3 day bus ticket for 12 euros and this will get you around the city on trams and buses plenty to do and see here

Poland

dumpdee — Thu, 24 May 2007 19:12:26 UT

Just returned from Poland ( 3 days early ) was robbed 1st night there.Police are a squad of skinheads who treated me like i was the criminal next day was given a fixed fine for crossing the road
Bank card would not work in the cash machine..................would not advise anyone to visit.
Only flight i could get out was to Liverpool cost me more to get home early than it did for a return.

LOOKING FOR MY DREAM WOMAN

dumpdee — Sun, 06 May 2007 18:07:20 UT

Hi i am looking for a woman
Preferably over 60 and preferably on benifits
You must have at least eight children from 3 or 4 previouse relationships
Obviously owned caravan would be nice but rented would do fine
Must not drive or weigh less than 20 stone
I am cool about body odour , smoking and drinking
I am up for lieing and cheating being used and taken for granted
If you fit the bill get in touch

YEAH RIGHT

also must live at least 2000 miles away

Bank of England

dumpdee — Thu, 01 Mar 2007 21:28:37 UT

Old woman goes into the Bank of England with a large bag of money
She askes to see the president
As she is an old lady he agrees
She says she wants to deposit money
He asks how much ?
She replies £1 million

He says thats a lot of money what do you do
Bet she replies
Bet he says what do you mean
Old lady replies Ok i bet £50.000 you that you have square balls
The bank manager cant refuse the bet
Ok he says
Old lady says can i come here next day at 11am with my lawyer as a witness
No problem says the the president

Next day the old lady return at 11am with her lawyer
She asks the president to drop his trousers
He obliges and drops his trousers
She asks him if she can touch them
The president says no problem as your paying £50.000 for the bet go ahead
She starts to feel his balls

The president notices the lawyer banging his head against the wall
Whats wrong with him ? the president asks
Oh nothing replies the old lady
I just had a bet with him for £250.000 that i would have the president of the Bank of Englands balls in my hands by 11.30 am today

DUMPDEE

dumpdee — Thu, 21 Dec 2006 15:06:39 UT

Click onto to google DUMPDEE it s its a website taking the piss out of my hometown Dundee